


Not like the shower at home

by Craftybadger1234



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Blow Jobs, Don't copy to another site, Hotel Sex, Humor, M/M, Shower Sex, Whining, hpsudsfest2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:22:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26423308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Craftybadger1234/pseuds/Craftybadger1234
Summary: Harry is excited about a little fun in the shower, but Draco's annoyed this muggle hotel shower isn't as good as the one at home.Or, shower sex isn't all it's cracked up to be.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Comments: 30
Kudos: 90
Collections: HP Suds Fest 2020





	Not like the shower at home

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the prompt - bad shower sex, with bonus points for an awkward injury that needs explaining. And I loved the prompt as soon as I saw it, b/c yeah I wholeheartedly agree - so fun to read, but not so great in real life. I've hinted at it in several fics I've written, and never thought to devote a whole fic to it. And now I have! I hope the prompter enjoys it!
> 
> Thanks to CleopatraIsMyName for beta work. I love the notes you add on what makes you laugh! :)
> 
> Thanks also to the mods for running this fest! It's my first time and I really enjoyed it. :)

Draco’s back hit the door with a dull thud he hoped didn’t alert their neighbours. He didn’t need the muggles in this hotel poking their heads into the hallway when he had Harry just where he wanted him - licking the sweat from Draco’s neck and nibbling his ear.

And fucking around with the fucking _key_ which was a fucking _card_ because _that_ made _loads_ of sense.

The lock beeped another negative and Draco had to push Harry off him to grab the key himself. “It’s like this.” He deftly inserted the card and removed it, and the tiny light glowed green with a happy beep. “How can you be so bad at it?”

“No idea,” Harry’s voice rumbled at his back. “Usually I’m so good at inserting things in other things.”

The door flew open and Harry chased Draco inside the moderately priced (ugh, as if they weren’t both wealthy beyond imagining and could afford better, but alas their impromptu holiday coincided with a conference) hotel room, straight to the bed. Harry’s body covered his and Draco almost gave in to the questing hands and the hard cock pressing into his hip.

“Shower first, you heathen! You promised!”

Harry moaned in protest, “But I love it when you’re all dirty.” Then his face lit up. “Come shower with me. We can clean up together.”

“But it’s a muggle shower…” Draco whined.

“But it’s a _hotel_ ,” Harry whined back, “and you said we’d have lots of hotel sex. Come on.” He stood and knocked Draco playfully on the knee. “Blow me in the shower and I’ll rim you 'til you cry.”

Draco groaned, but mostly just for show at this point. Honestly, with an offer like that, who would say no? “Fine! But it better be real tears!”

Harry whooped and yanked his t-shirt off, throwing it in the general vicinity of their other dirty clothes on his way to the bathroom. Draco kicked the shirt into the pile and added his own t-shirt and jeans. Ugh, their hike had made him sweaty in the worst sort of way. He peeled off his damp socks with a shudder.

In the bathroom, Harry was already in all his naked glory. Tanned, sculpted muscles. Tight arse and that gorgeous cock, which Harry was already working over. Impatience was his middle name. He grinned at Draco, holding his free hand in the spray of water waiting for the water to heat.

Waiting, and waiting. Because of course the pipes weren’t magical and so the water didn’t come out at the perfect temperature already like it did at home. Draco crossed his arms and huffed the fringe from his eyes. He caught sight of himself in the large bathroom mirror and quickly turned his back on his reflection.

“This horrible lighting does nothing for my complexion. I miss the candlelight in our shower.”

“We can’t have candles in here, it’s a fire hazard.”

Curse this muggle hotel and this holiday’s subsequent lack of magic. “That’s just ridiculous. We know how to put out fires.” Draco rolled his eyes, even if Harry wasn’t looking at him. Standing around naked, waiting for the water to heat was even more ridiculous.

But thank Merlin, Harry’s grin said the water’s temperature had reached an acceptable level. He stepped into the tub and offered a hand to help Draco in.

Blocking all the water in the process.

The droplets that misted Draco’s face and legs had already cooled, so he manhandled Harry until they’d switched positions. “Oh fuck, it’s burning up!” Draco yelped, as he darted away from the spray. He knocked into Harry, who caught him before he fell through the curtain. 

“Easy… I’ll make it cooler.”

They argued back and forth until they’d reached an equilibrium neither of them liked - too cold for Harry, too hot for Draco.

“Uh-uh,” Draco tsked as Harry ran a hand down Draco’s chest. “Wash first. I’m not sucking anything until it’s squeaky clean.”

Harry put his head under the spray, once again pushing Draco out of it and into the plastic wall of the shower. He smothered a shriek. “Be careful! These walls are freezing!” At home, the tiles were charmed to start warming when the water ran, so that one could comfortably rest if one was, say for example, being fucked into oblivion against the wall.

“Sorry.” Harry shook out his wet hair, spraying Draco with more water. “Want to wash my hair?”

“Sure.” He reached for the tiny bottle of hotel shampoo with a grimace. “I’m going to murder you for leaving my toiletry bag at home.”

“Sorry,” Harry said as he had every time Draco had mentioned it. It sounded less sincere with each rendition, especially since Harry didn’t want to waste holiday play time to replace it. And given the way he’d fucked Draco over the last three days, he really had no room to complain.

“Erm,” Draco rubbed his soapy hands together, “You’re going to have to crouch down or something. I can’t reach your hair without getting soap in your eyes or mine. If only there was a convenient ledge we could enlarge like in the shower at home.”

“It’s okay, I don’t mind kneeling for you.” 

Draco wasn’t prepared for the sudden drop of Harry’s body - the body that _was_ blocking the spray of water. It hit Draco square in the face, making him splutter over the sound of Harry’s laughing. Wretch. Draco shoved his hands into Harry’s hair, tugging aggressively in payback. A worthless effort, since Harry actually liked a little hair pulling. A few strands stuck to his fingers and he wrinkled his nose as he rinsed them away.

“Rinse.”

Harry stood to wash out the shampoo, grinning as suds ran down his body. His fingers chased them over his chest. “Mm… sexy suds… Do I look like something out of a magazine?”

“You look like a drowned rat, plonker.” Draco smiled anyway and gave Harry a kiss on the tip of his nose. “My drowned rat. Conditioner next.”

Although he wasn’t sure why he bothered. The tiny bottle seemed determined to keep hold of whatever conditioner it held. But he managed to squeeze out enough and massaged it gently through Harry’s gorgeous locks. A few days without the products Draco bought for him wouldn’t cause much damage, but Draco missed the citrusy scent of their regular shampoo and conditioner.

“Kiss me,” Harry whispered after he rinsed his hair a second time. Draco wrapped chilled arms around Harry, making him moan. “You feel so cool after the warm water.”

“That’s because I’m outside the spray of water,” Draco deadpanned.

“Oh, let’s just -” He turned them so Draco could rest in the spray, and drew him in for a kiss. He tasted soapy and salty, and the odd, flat taste of water which should have no taste at all and yet somehow did.

“I miss the wide array of shower heads we have.” No sitting out in the cold mist at their house!

“Me too,” Harry said as the water cooled on his skin. Draco could see the wheels turning in Harry’s mind, thinking of ways to switch their positions so _he_ could be in the water again.

“We need to clean you,” Draco said softly, running a hand up Harry’s cock. A perfect distraction!

Automatically, Harry reached behind him, to where the shower shelf sat in their own shower. The one stocked with soft microfibre flannels and various bathing products, and a special water-resistant lubricant that frequently came in handy.

“Oh,” he said, bewildered for a moment. “I forgot a flannel. Hold tight.”

As if Draco had anywhere to go. He rinsed quickly, assuming he could take a real (solo) shower later on, while Harry stepped out. Water splashed all over the bathroom floor and Harry nearly skidded on the bathmat that was really just a slightly thicker towel. He pulled two flannels from the stack by the mirror and handed them to Draco. The thin, rough terry cloth smelled vaguely of bleach.

More horrible, industrial soap for Harry’s body. And all right, Draco really did enjoy this part. And not just because he got to be the one in the spray of water. He also got to run the soapy flannel across Harry’s firm chest, down the ridges of his sculpted abs, and around the hard cock pointing right at Draco. Harry moaned and rolled his hips gently through the circle of Draco’s fist and nipped lightly at Draco’s earlobe. 

“Is that enough?” Harry asked as Draco cupped his bollocks with the flannel and _squeezed_.

“Not quite.” He spun Harry around and quickly washed his back and over his arms. He took a little extra care with his arse for no good reason other than he liked to torture Harry. “Legs next.” Again, he lamented there was no helpful ledge to rest a foot on. But Harry managed to lift one leg, then the other, balancing precariously and bracing himself against the wall. 

“Now?” Harry whined, squeezing the base of his cock.

“Now,” Draco said breathily as he slid down Harry’s body to kneel on the shower floor. He scrunched up his face. “Can’t you at least cushion the shower floor?”

“Well, my wand is -” he pointed vaguely to the side.

“Forget it. I can make do.”

As he shifted to find a comfortable position, he thought of their perfect, amazing, wonderful, _magical_ shower at home and the rubbery floor layered in cushioning charms. At least it wouldn’t last long - he could probably finish Harry off in less than five minutes.

Harry shifted so the spray hit his chest and ran down his body, forcing Draco to shift backwards awkwardly. His feet bumped the wall behind him because of course this shower wasn’t as roomy as the one at home. He ended up in an awkward crouch he did not particularly enjoy. Especially once the water arcing off Harry’s cock in the most ridiculous way hit Draco right in the face. He took the prick into his mouth anyway, and then the water ran over Draco’s nose and mouth. He had to push Harry back and as much to one side as they could manage in the small space, so he didn’t drown. 

He wanted to make this good for Harry, especially knowing he would make it _fucking brilliant_ for Draco later. But he’d already had enough of this round of hotel sex. He’d rather re-do the rickety desk chair that fell over yesterday.

Slowly he took Harry as deep as he could manage. Even though he didn’t taste like himself - too much bland water and weird soap - he certainly sounded like himself. He moaned, as Draco licked and sucked, with an array of sounds that finally had Draco enjoying himself enough to feel his own cock thickening.

“You are so fucking gorgeous,” Harry said, moving a lock of wet hair off Draco’s face. “Just so… _fuck_ , Draco… that’s so good… Can I come on your face?”

Draco popped off with an indignant squeal. “No! It’s a huge fucking mess!”

“We’re in a shower! You can just rinse it off!” 

There wasn’t much time to debate it, and Draco tried to keep in mind his own fun on the horizon. “Fine,” he grumbled.

Harry’s grin was worth it. “It won’t be much… I’ve come so many times on this holiday, honestly I’m surprised I even got it up.”

Draco slowly licked Harry’s cock from base to tip. Harry’s moan escalated, ending on a heavy whoosh of an exhale when Draco sucked lightly at the tip. “Yeah,” Harry said hoarsely, “actually I’m not so surprised.” His ragged breath came faster. “Open up. Tilt your head back. Yes… just like that.”

Harry pumped furiously at his cock, a slow flush creeping down his chest. Draco smiled, knowing the end was near. He licked along his lips and flicked his tongue at Harry playfully.

“Merlin, yes, Draco…”

The first splash of come streaked across his cheek and his tongue darted out to catch it but then - 

“Bloody fuck! You got it in my _eye_ , you motherfucking _wanker_!”

“Sorry, shit, I’m so sorry, Draco! Here, let me -” Harry yanked Draco to his feet and turned him towards the water. “It’s all right. Sorry. Just… rinse it off, I’ll be right back.”

Draco moaned and tried blinking into the water, a hopeless endeavour as the water sliced at his sensitive eyeball. He gargled and spat the water, trying to clean out his mouth. Then rinsed his cheek, but of course the come stuck to his skin like glue and had to be scrubbed with the scratchy flannel and even then he kept running a hand over his cheek to be sure he’d got it all off.

“It’s okay,” he heard from the bathroom door. “I can fix it.”

He squeaked when Harry shoved his wand at Draco’s eye. “Get that the fuck away from me!” Draco yelled. “You can’t just point your _wand_ at my _eye_!”

“Especially since that’s what got us in trouble in the first place,” Harry mumbled. With a grin, the little fucker.

Draco growled. “What did you say?”

Immediately contrite, Harry babbled, “Nothing, love, you look beautiful. Gorgeous. It’s barely noticeable at all.” Harry held a towel out to him with a hopeful expression that begged for forgiveness. “Really, I’m so sorry.”

Draco shut the shower off and angrily dried his face and body. “You’d better be.” He shouldered past Harry to the bedroom, and dug through his drawer of clothes.

Harry pulled Draco flush against his chest. “What are you doing?” he whispered in Draco’s ear. His hand tightened on Draco’s hip. “Not getting dressed are you?”

“You think I want to play around with you now?’

“Mm… no… but I think I want to play around with _you_ and I did promise…” He threw Draco down on the bed and crawled up his naked body for a slow, deep kiss. “And I always keep my promises…”

“Well…” Draco said reluctantly, not wanting to give in too easily, “since it means so much to you…”

And of course Harry kept his promise.

\--------

“Welcome to Sweet Treats. My name is Amanda. Just let me know when you’re ready to put your box together!” The young woman behind the counter smiled widely, and gestured to the display boxes of various sizes on the wall behind her.

Draco adjusted the bag of his new, very _expensive_ bath products and looked around the chocolate shop, overwhelmed by the possibilities of so many glass cases of chocolate truffles in all shapes and sizes. Another little treat for Draco, to pick out his very own collection of chocolates. And well he deserved it too! His eyelashes fluttered and he couldn’t help but gingerly touch the puffy skin around his eye.

“Oh no,” Amanda said sympathetically. “Is that pink eye? Ugh, I had pink eye last autumn and had to throw away all my eye make-up. Even this lovely blue eye shadow I can’t seem to find again.”

Rage bubbled in Draco at the _third_ person this afternoon to ask him that. “It’s not pink eye! It’s - I got shampoo in my eye! And then… had a bit of a crying jag.” Next to him, Harry sniggered, practically begging for Draco to smack his arm. Which he did.

“I see,” Amanda said, darting her glance between Harry and Draco.

And fucking hell, Draco could see that she _did_ see. 

She offered Draco a square chocolate with shimmery gold dust on top. “Here, on the house. Bourbon liquor truffle.” With efficient, practised movements she assembled her largest box. “You’ll be wanting to buy the larger box then?” she said to Harry.

Draco moaned as the chocolate dissolved on his tongue, noting the light flush to Harry’s cheeks at the sound. Just to torture him, Draco licked his thumb and forefinger clean of non-existent chocolate. 

“I think we’ll take two," Harry choked out, his eyes glued to the movement.

“Let me go and get another box!” Amanda disappeared to a back room.

Harry wrapped an arm around Draco’s waist and whispered, “Don’t linger. I want to take you back to our room and fuck you up against the window.”

“With the lovely view of the carpark? I can hardly wait," Draco said with an eye roll.

He already knew he’d say yes. Even if it was nothing like the view from their bedroom window.


End file.
